My travels of touch and gaze

I love to travel

swimming in seas and clouds, inhaling light and dark

life's mystery I have been trying to unravel.

but the unbearable touch left its mark

my defence could only try

but the touch and gaze were stark

wrapped like a mummy was I

yet naked as a bone

and he, for not a second, was shy

no, I wasn’t touched; nor was I alone

he stripped my skin down to every layer though

I was bare like a smooth but lifeless stone

do I breathe? do I fight my foe?

do I gaze back?

do I burn his sight? will it affect the status quo?

I am powerful; I can attack

yet, I fear all of their gaze

they turn me into a meaty barren sack.

I am not weak, but how do I stay unfazed?

from their abuse and rape,

they think my body is theirs to graze

when I am touched, they take another shape

I am impure

my body is an outcast to be gaped.

I must fight and I can, sure.

but my blood ran cold, my vision blurred

As I began to lose hope for a cure.

I wish to be free; I am a caged bird

his eyes were my shackles

I desperately searched for a sword.

he is mr. hyde, for his dear ones he is jekyll

stranger to me, he is off all books,

knowing there is nothing to tackle.

my perception of my lack of looks

gave me the incorrect impression

that I was safe from their hooks

but they all treat me as their possession

burqa or bikini,

nothing can to protect us from their obsession

my chest moved only for breathing

which he watched with eagerness

And I held it in because I was shaking

I know the touch of kindness

a caress of love, a kiss of care, a hug of affection,

but theirs caused a deafening silence

I have been taught that covering is protection

how do I tell the world,

that that only fed my trepidation

one had no sight yet he whirled

the other could see and did not move

and I was a plastic doll for them made to twirl.

will I ever be free of this gloom?

tell me the truth.

so I will always stay in my room.

my fight seems uncouth

but I have grown in this containment

every move I watch like a sleuth

how can I fight the crime never committed?

who do I talk to? what do I say?

when miles away they were seated?

the protective hand did stay

but they are no sinners or criminals

when their crime was whiter than gray.

I refuse to wake up dismal

I am no plastic doll made to touch

I am an indestructible crystal.

a living breathing body with a grudge

not a rib, an entity

whose words and choices are always judged

this universal agony is no mystery

it is conditioned, almost inherent

they refuse to give up their bigotry

some journeys end

but this asks me to kneel

my body ain't a thing to be lent

the world I'll conquer but this is a tattooed seal

and they always come back offering hands 

looking for something to steal.

I have no stolen goods on my land

my body is a pure divine hearth

gold pours from my every scar and strand

I shall travel to every corner of this earth

but our journey also pass through this kingdom

each of our ships survived this rotten firth

I do not possess prophetic wisdom

but this is the never-ending travel

of conquering our bodies and our own freedom.

I am me

Enraged like the sea

Deeper than a tree

No touch can shackle me

No hand can enslave me

I am me.

I am me.

I am me.

Enraged and free.

~ Aazka

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